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My brother drank himself sick last night. Nothing new about that at all, but unlike other nights, he passed out, hit his side, and broke his glasses in such a way that I wasn't sure how they'd stay on after. I managed to fix them so they'd hold, but that's all. I can't do anything about his life, or anything else.
The last time I saw him this bad, I could at least lift him, but even that's out of the question now. I'm not strong, and I got upset. Really, really angry with the silence, and his carelessness, and my own lack of strength, though I've always said that "people can only fix themselves", because it's what I've been told, repeatedly. But I wonder how much is possible sometimes, and how much longer it's going to be.
It's routine now. But I beg my cousins, his friends, anyone that can listen, "stop feeding this, stop offering, stop picking up the tab, please please please see what I'm seeing", so what can I say that I haven't said already? I can lecture him "one more time", but what's the point? Maybe I shouldn't have fixed his glasses, but just finding something "fixable" was maybe more for myself than him.
The worst part is, he can't remember. Just stared at me like I was nuts when I told him "let the glasses dry".
The last time I saw him this bad, I could at least lift him, but even that's out of the question now. I'm not strong, and I got upset. Really, really angry with the silence, and his carelessness, and my own lack of strength, though I've always said that "people can only fix themselves", because it's what I've been told, repeatedly. But I wonder how much is possible sometimes, and how much longer it's going to be.
It's routine now. But I beg my cousins, his friends, anyone that can listen, "stop feeding this, stop offering, stop picking up the tab, please please please see what I'm seeing", so what can I say that I haven't said already? I can lecture him "one more time", but what's the point? Maybe I shouldn't have fixed his glasses, but just finding something "fixable" was maybe more for myself than him.
The worst part is, he can't remember. Just stared at me like I was nuts when I told him "let the glasses dry".
